Convicted about Binge Eating

My fellow readers. Yes, it's true, I've denied it many times but the truth is I do go on occasional binges. It's time for me to face the truth about my eating habits. Even as a child I was fed beyond what my stomach could handle! This habit continued even at the age of twenty, but this area has been repeatedly been revealed to me, especially when I was nineteen turning twenty. I know by reading God's Word that this is sin, because number one it is gluttony. Secondly it is idolatry, because I was lusting after food. Thirdly it is fleshly, feeding the appetites of flesh rather than my soul, which is done by reading and meditating on the Word of God. Mind you, I wasn't transformed in a day. It was a process! Now, I have lost much weight compared with my high school years. I even hung out with gluttons in high school which did not help either. But God hears me and sees where I am heading. My dad has diabetes. I realized the path I was going on, especially when I saw the TV Show: You are What You Eat. That really hit the pit of my stomach!

I prayed and prayed. I even cried kneeling on the kitchen floor crying for God to give me desires for healthy food. Maybe someday, I will talk to you about how my eating habit became very dangerous in that it lead to me committing grave sins that nearly destroyed me even after God delivered me from my Egypt. All this may sound very cryptic, but I am sure I will reveal all to you in due time. But my focus is on the relapse that occurred last night after I came home from work. No one was really home, since my dad has no idea about anything about my life, nor my coming and going. And he could care less what I eat. So I ate and ate and ate. I couldn't stop myself. I was scared. I realized I was stressed about exams and going to school that night to study and the limited time I had. I placed my hope in food to comfort me but I know if I continue this, I would be in a great deal of danger. That is why I have to pray everyday that I will not fall into this temptation. I also need to become more fit as I'm sure everyone else feels. But to control what I eat first by exercising self control which is only for me has been through His Spirit. I know how it feels to walk in freedom from the lust of food and I know the victories both great and small that I experienced. I have tasted and seen that the LORD is good and nothing can take His place. Now it is a matter of being consistent and managing these decisions daily for a greater future and a better today!